SUPERVISION - Your priority near the pool

There are 23 more days til Christmas. 

There is only 8 more days til Hannah's 10th Birthday.

I should be preparing a house full of near teenage girls partying with their horses and eating cake but instead I visit a grave and watch other parents do the same this time of year.  Other parents are also heartbreakingly watching their child die slowly from their injuries because they too drowned not so long ago and their medical complications are nearing the end.  Its all too darn tragic.  Its an awful time for everyone but what is frustrating me most right now is that we can't change the past of those victims who are suffering and those on the outside of our world aren't listening to the messages of saving kids lives and their own.

This morning I received a phone call from Lee.   She raved about our safety messages and said she shared them when she could on social media. Thanks Lee, we need more people like you. 

Lee's phone call had me wild, angry and shaking my head but honestly I wasn't suprised by it at all because we are seeing it time and time again.    Lee's story was only recent and its impacted her severely that she had to call us.    Whilst visiting friends with a pool all the kids were swimming in Swim vests with Lee in the pool.  No one was on the pool deck supervising, leaving the onus of responsibility to Lee.  She felt rather uncomfortable.    Another parent dropped her child off with just a kickboard.  A non swimmer to which Lee is unaware.  Mum leaves to go visit the home owner and Lee is now watching three non swimmers, two in vests and one not.   Seconds later she is swimming frantically to get to the non swimmer who is now on the bottom of the pool and the kickboard swimmingly on top.  Its all happened in a blink.   Blocking her view too was a bean bag floating in the pool.  The child was under it. 

These occurrences are too frequent and they must stop.

Parents need to think.  Just because one person is there doesn't mean all kids are safer. Infact the more kids to less adults the more the risk, the higher risk is no adults at all with kids in the pool.  Whilst Lee was rescuing this child, the other two children were NOT supervised.    When swimmers are in the water including Adults EVERYONE must be supervised ON DECK.  Where was that supervision on deck? 

Drowning has no sound, it is silent.  When the victim is vertical in the water their arms will angel push their bodies to the top of the water in an attempt to survive and to get AIR.  They can't call out, they are fighting for AIR to live, to breathe.  Drowning is called the Silent killer for a reason because its deadly silent.  Ask only parent who has witnessed this eerie  silence of death.  

Swimming is a fun part of Christmas with family.   Very quickly though as Lee recounted it could have been very different.  Whilst the child was okay coughing and spluttering with her little heart racing what astounds me further is that the mother of this child was oblivious to the whole situation.   Dismissing it as Lee's fault and that nothing serious happened.  Whilst Lee took her supervision seriously and with three kids, a quick accident of this child losing her kick board, her sole floatation aid turned to horror under the water.   I feel for Lee and this child, this would and was a scary and very real situation.  Of course if the situation was fatal the public would be turning on Lee and the blame game starting.  Happens every time.

It astounds me that so few parents don't take water seriously when it involves children.  They are oblivious to their own actions. Other actions are propping open pool gates.  This killed 7 children last year and I am angry that NOT one pool owner/carer/parent or tenant who propped that gate open were charged.    They breached safety.     The safety in this case?   Supervision was there but there were no barriers.  A barrier in this case would have been a Life jacket compliant to standards.  Not a swim vest although with three non swimmers a vest is better than nothing.  The child should have been instructed to not go outside the depth of the shallow end.  Lee didnt know this child or her ability, yet the onus was placed on Lee to fully watch this child.    Again, its always the supervisors fault or the carer at the time, which was Lee.

Lee stated she will never, ever accept the responsibility of another child in a body of water again.   The pressure was enormous and she is angry. I feel her anger. 

It takes 20 seconds to drown.   Then the brain starts to die.  Slowly.   Its a timed race against time that truly no one should ever experience.

There are many stories out there of frightening events like this. We try to tell the facts of drowning and how quickly they occur.  

Please I urge you to help your children around water, be with them, play with them, get them familiar and for pete's sake TEACH them survival skills at a swim school.  Roll over and float.  Do not teach them breath holding it, too, is dangerous.

A message for today, keep an eye on your kids, and actively supervise them.  If they are non swimmers get in the water with them to keep them at arms reach it wont hurt you.

A message this Christmas....  Stay Alive and Supervise your children

Just because kids can swim doesn't mean they can't drown, many swimmers drowned last year.  

Kat Plint
Learn to Swim Instructor
Drowning Prevention Advocate

My vision: my Reality

It's been seven years, two months and nine days since we lost Hannah.  Many thought we'd never last as a charity, let alone a family, together.  Well we are.

In January 2008 I met Rachelle and Richard Beesley who set me on a path to follow a dream to become a Swimming Instructor.   Only problem:  I hated water.  Freaked out at Chlorine.  Cried when I saw blonde hair blue eyed girls in purple swimmers and the list went on.

Harry and I in Sydney whilst he was doing KASS.  Lunch at Bondi

I so badly wanted to make a difference in the water but for the past seven years its been outside.  Well up until now that is.

On the 10th November 2014 I finally finished my ASCTA Learn to Swim.   Its taken seven years in and out of the water, multiple sessions with my private psychiatrist and help from Professional Counsellor Dawn Macintyre to get to this point.   Professionals gave me the power in  my mind amidst all the trauma to get through this but what truly did make the solid difference to my success and confidence was a few people in the swim industry who made it happen.  Some public and a few private who choose not to be mentioned on my rippled journey.

I have spent time in schools volunteering to watch kids in the water, visiting swim schools and just sitting by the pool watching, observing and coming home to write my notes and views.  I've seen many things that make me shudder and thank the stars that we don't have more statistics.   I pulled a child from the water not so long back and I did it without batting an eye lid.  This child clearly just forgot to kick and was in trouble and sank wide eyed looking at us from the side of the pool.   Others just stood thinking I was crazy but clearly NOT many adults KNOW what drowning looks like or when a swimmer is in trouble.  Adults need to be more aware, whilst supervision is active what could seem as seemless fun could infact be a child in trouble.  I overheard a parent on the course of my LTS Journey that their child was a 'lazy kicker' in the pool.  I've heard 'my kids can swim 200m blah blah' yet when put the test the kids can't even get to the side of the pool let alone contemplate the end of the lane.  It's scary.

With my time at KASS in Sydney in 2008 and again for six weeks with our son Harry in 2010 I observed and asked so many questions I was empowered.   When we travelled to the USA in 2012 to attend the NDPA conference in San Diego I spoke to many about Infant Swim in Australia, Learn to Float in the USA and other programs that focus on Survival.  Its about surviving the water fun that can turn deadly in seconds. 

I focus on survival.   The messages of safety are important and children and their parents get them at every lesson. I dont intend to set out to teach a champion.  I want survival.  Survival to keep kids fit. Survival skills to help kids problem solve and empower kids with enough information that they respect the water.  I can tell you the amount of children between 8 and 18 that play dangerous games, enter risk and dares is beyond comprehension.   We only have seen the statistics but I can assure you, if your boy is aged in this bracket at one point in his life he will take a water risk.   Educate them.

KASS started me off on my journey.  We wanted to open a swim school in QLD to just teach survival.  It is still a dream but now I am closer to it.  The Survival is still not supported as a regime but that's okay. For me, I know it works and I just wish Hannah had of had that opportunity because we will never know if it could have saved her.

From KASS we ventured to Goodna Pool with Justin Lemberg (former Olympian, Darren, Di, Judy and his team).   After a fatal at their public pool I had formed a relationship with both Justin and Di as professionals to guide me further on my journey.  I asked questions.  I nagged them about programs and WHY this was done and why that was done.  It all aided me in my quest.

For the past five years Ive battled the demons of the pool.  Just getting myself in the water was an enormous task.  The fears and flashbacks of Hannah in the pool was horrific that I'd shake and I had to get out.   I would sit at the side and dabble my feet.    Watch kids playing.  One time I left the pool in tears and couldn't even manage the 50 minute drive home. I sat for hours in the car park asking myself "what the hell am i doing this for?"

Dawn Macintyre was my sounding board of frustration and my inabilities.  My Psychiatrist had diagnosed me with multiple disorders which were helpful but I felt labelled and over medicated.   I don't want to be a label in the pool.  I don't want to be a LTS who a mother of a child who drowned but sadly I do and I am.  That's my reality.   Who wants their child taught by a mother who failed to supervise her child?   There's a few which is encouraging.

My log book is extensive with observations at 9 swim schools around three states of Australia 2 in the USA and over 167 hrs in the water with kids and instructors and 111 beside the pool.   I've over exerted myself with knowledge but I'm grateful for the opportunity.

In 2013 my life took a turn in April for the worst.  A health scare made me organise my life with an updated Will and making arrangements for possible Physcial care.   Suffering the worst two surgeries in nine days and cardiac issues and being in ICU i re-evaluated my life as it was.

In October 2013 I ventured back into the pool.  Just walking and getting my strength back was the biggest struggle.  Walking hurt, my back hurt everything from surgery hurt and it was weak.   My physiotherapist and Surgeon said "to strength your lower body you must get in the water'.  The ground could have swallowed me then and there.   

So swim I did.

Eve Fraser at Greenbank and her manager Viki got me in the pool walking laps for hours I just walked at chest height with the water slapping my slides.  It tooks me 3 times a week to get the courage up to book in to what would ultimately now change my life.   I booked a Learn to Swim course to become a teacher.

I bit the bullet so to speak.  My Husband Andrew was worried of course and I battled and cried as I struggled with my health (he had taken four months off to look after me and the kids) and then to get fit was the life changer.  I was losing weight.  I was walking faster, coping with stair cases, even riding a horse again which my surgeon suggested was probably not a good idea but I LOVE RIDING.

I've seen some of the best at work and I am truly blessed.   I've managed two CPR courses in 13 months and a First Aid course something many of us try to avoid having lost a child with our fruitless attempts.  I am now qualified and I aim to equip kids with skills, knowledge, fitness and survival skills to the best of my ability and help those kids, who like me, fear the water.   I don't ever proclaim to the best but I am good at it.

My dream to one day opening up the Hannahs Foundation Not For Profit Swim School is one step closer to our dream for our baby girl and it's her, my family and all those who have helped this journey, have made it possible.

Never tell me I cant do it.  Because I have and I am determined to make a difference. To all those parents who think they can't do something, you can.  It's taken me seven years and it's been one hell of a wild ride.

Kat Plint
Learn to Swim Instructor


 

In the real world

Response to:  Article from IVillage – QUOTE “If you don’t teach your kids to swim, you’re selfish.”I’m going to say it: This is straight-up lazy parenting.(unquote)

Dear Anonymous,

I write to express my utter distaste for your delivery of tone in your recent article on IVillage.  How Perfect you must be sitting at your desk insinuating that parents don’t care about their children, are lazy and inept in the care of their children when it comes to water safety.  You have certainly raised a few eyebrows as an ANONYMOUS author.  

What’s my view on the anonymous protection of your identity?  GUTLESS and COWARDLY!  

View point on the article itself?   You had great intentions but you totally missed the mark in a huge way, sending social media into a frenzy of mothers out there having to PROTECT their decisions for THEIR families. 

You on the other hand have obviously, purposely alienated yourself by not identifying yourself. I wonder if you did show us who you are, would you get hate mail?   Like the parents of children who drown do because they apparently failed.  I have plenty of hate mail and threats and so have my surviving children.   Drowning is cruel.  It’s incomprehensible  what families and victims go through.  It’s forever life changing.  Your life hasn’t changed has it Dear Anonymous?   Or Has it?   Was that day a wake up call for you?  How about instead of blaming and questioning others in your world why not question those close to home?  

I am the parent of a daughter, Hannah, aged 34 months at the time of her death who did exactly what your child's friend managed to do with chairs and open a pool gate and enter pool water.  Hannah knew the rules of our house, she could swim she had swum from six months of age and two nights before her death managed to complete two full lengths of our above ground pool without stopping in her freestyle.   She could have done three laps.  

Hannah died two days later on October 4^th 2007. I was changing my son’s nappy, that’s how quick it happened.    Just like you said in your article that the child in your care knew better.  My question is really, were they old enough to know better?  Had they been around water all their life to know better?  Had you told them the rules of the house or did you have ‘expect’ a child of eight to know?   My child was only nearing three years old and yet I don’t blame her one bit, it’s my fault.  I find it very infuriating to hear such diatribe from the uneducated on pool safety.  You know nothing.  It’s probably irrelevant to you, nor do I think you care but Hannah’s Coronial Inquest shaped the pool safety laws in QLD for what they are right now into SAVING LIVES.    Our house had 19 breaches to building codes, council had approved our house as compliant prior to purchase we thought our house was safe.  We taught Hannah to swim, all our five children can swim, we did everything right in trying to keep our children safe.  Yet for whatever reason when I was inside and Hannah was beside me, then to walk out on to our verandah and access our locked pool gate is just unthinkable.  Its been seven years and I still have nightmares.  Do you have nightmares Dear Anonymous for your near miss?   Do you?   I doubt it.  Heartless people don’t have nightmares they give me nightmares.   

There are two facts are in your article that make me really mad as a parent of a child who drowned and as a drowning prevention advocate.  *(Google me:  Kat Plint, Hannah’s Foundation)

FACT 1:  Your pool had items of climbing potential around it and it was scaled that is a MASSIVE FAIL on your part.   

FACT 2:  You only just sighted this child after she had scaled your pool fence and you watched her.  WHO does that?   Why did you educate this child on safety?  You wouldn’t of been there if that child had of dived in, fallen in or hit her head etc.  

How fast can you run Anonymous to your pool?   15 – 45seconds at best maybe?   By the time you get outside it’s too late.  Her brain would be slowly being deprived of oxygen and dying.  This is real. This is drowning. Not swimming, it’s about survival.   Could you live with that?  Could you live with telling your child's friends parent that their child died on your watch because you were too lazy to be outside?  

Many parents know that Active supervision is required when kids are in and around water.  Those that drown are unfortunate sad accidents that yes could have been avoided but for momentary lapses for whatever reason unintentional a child died and that is tragic.   There is no cure for drowning only prevention.  You might just pay to look up the word RISK in the dictionary.  Life is full of risks Dear Anonymous and its not just eight year olds who come to play at your house and can’t swim that could die in your care. 

The facts are staring at you and you failed in your insulating grab at poor mums out there that you were nearly me.   You could have been living my life.  A child drowned in my care it could have been you.  Fact is that drowning can and will happen to anyone, anytime if safety isn’t paramount.  I’m glad for one that you aren’t living my life because it’s a pretty crappy life to live and get up every day knowing that your baby isn’t alive and isn’t with you.  

FACT:  Your Supervision wasn’t active until right at the end. Active supervision, where was it?   You are one of the lucky ones Dear Anonymous, one of the lucky ones that doesn’t live with such tragic consequences, live life of grief and constant public ridicule of why what were you doing.   The tirade of tone in your post was offensive.  Blaming mothers for their yoga and not teaching their kids to swim?  Are you serious? 

HOW dare you?  Who are you? Should we, the public care what you think?   No not really because any caring parent firstly wouldn’t  judge another but instead offer support to help the situation. You take digging the knives into others isn’t helping our cause of advocacy.  Life is a potential risk.    
Let me educate you on the real facts of the tragedy that could have unfolded in your back yard.

FACT:  20 seconds is all it takes for a child to drown. 

FACT: Most kids who drown over five years can swim or have had lessons. Even those under five too. Those that don’t are more often than not, not the ones drowning.   In the past two years children over Eight who have died have been Swimmers who DROWNED.  Good Swimmers, Olympic Swimmers and Divers have drowned.   

FACT:  Coroners in Australia have only ever recommended Supervision and Compliant barriers to prevent drowning and have never questioned swimming lessons or the ability of a victim.  

FACT:  With so many who do swim, can swim and have drowned, the only conclusion you can possibly equate is that swimming doesn’t save lives if it did why do swimmers drown? 

FACT:  Swimmers drown because they are unskilled.   Even the best of Olympic and competition swimmers in open water ways have become troubled in water and died.  Nothing can equip you for every possible scenario in water but yes teaching kids just to get out of the pool is a bit unrealistic as well its not about getting out its about SURVIVAL.  

FACT:  your house is probably more than dangerous than you care to even contemplate.   Poisons in unlocked cupboards, televisions on furniture, blind cords, the list goes on including the family care.  Kids can be killed in any part of the home. 

I find your expectations of a child all of eight years to be unrealistic.   A child may know the rules, be trained in all the emergency procedures but I’d like to inform you that when kids are tested in times of dangers THEY FORGET.  Adults forget too.  Dear Anonymous do you know CPR?   Can you do it effectively when under stress with a dying child in front of you?   It may be a mean and nasty question but its fact because this is what is faced with many of us who try and save our own child.  CPR doesn’t always work either there are no guarantees in life.

You expect every child to know how to swim, not climb a fence, not be adventurous and not get into mischief at your house?   What were you doing inside the house if she was outside?  This would be a police question.  One I was asked and so were many other parents.   If kids can’t be adventurous in house how sad for your children.  And even sadder is that this little girl can’t come back to your house to play and have social interaction with friends, your child.    How awful.   I sincerely hope you told your child that her friend can’t come to play because her friend can’t swim.   Get over yourself, you cant be serious? How petty.   That would be like me saying to my children’s friends you can’t come here because you can’t horse ride, ride motorbikes, quad bikes or pat the cows because they aren’t farmers or have never been on a farm.  What about life experience Dear Anonymous? 
  
There are some very sad accidents in life and I am sure having read many of the parent’s comments to your post that they too are seething at you.   Im just annoyed at your naivity.   Mothers have a hard job at best, yet just like the other debates across mummy blog world breast vs bottle, natural vs caesarean, vaccinate or no vacs the list goes on you have segregated a community of mothers who are unable to have their children taught to swim.   Many would want their children to swim. It’s not a can’t matter,  its unable.  These mothers respond with other safety precautions and they too, have my support.

Yes swimming is a skill for life and I agree. Think about those who you criticised.  A mother in a wheelchair raising four kids and a husband who travels.   Do you offer to support this mother and help her in the water at the pool?   Don’t think so.

A mother who is raising three children, two severely austistic.  Water is an attraction to autistic children and these mothers have a hard time just getting two hours sleep let alone fight with their children in the pool with an instructor and end up having an overstimulated child who doesn’t sleep afterwards making for a ‘shitty’ night. Only to have to do it all again next week to suit your opinion that they are lazy parents.  They are not lazy at all.  These mothers don’t put their kids in harms way they go way above it to avoid it.  

Those mothers just trying to keep a roof over their childrens head and food on the table.   Seriously you dont  live their lives so stay out of it, look after you own life Its not perfect by any means.  

Just because Dear Anonymous you want every child to swim isn’t realistic.  There are children too who can’t swim because they too are disabled, have a medical condition which doesn’t allow them to be in water because it’s too dangerous.   Would you expect a child of eight who had over 40 seizures a day to learn to swim?   Do you know how dangerous that is not only for the child but for the instructor (with two other kids in their class) too. Would you have this child visit your home?  Are your prepared for this too?     

Unrealistic expectations is what you have Dear Anonymous.    How sad our world has become.  Such a pity that the anonymous’ out there life, live in their perfect bubbled worlds and aren’t very charitable towards others.

Sadly when a child drowns Dear Anonymous I can hear your posts now that the poor mums are to blame. Give mothers a break.

Feel free to contact Hannah's Foundation, a registered charity to support drowning victims and their families and who provide valuable community education to prevent drownings.

Kat Plint

 

 

Drowning: the inbetween Life and Death Victim survivor - a Mothers story

Yesterday I received a letter via email from another mother, Evelynne(Name changed) who shared with me the most personal details of her five year old daughters drowning in 2012. She has asked me to share it.

I'd like to thank Evelynne for her words and recall of this all too common tragedy in the backyard pool.

Drowning, when reported in the media has usually two outcomes for the general public; Dead or alive.  On many occasions children are in the Intensive Care unit fighting for life and the media never report the 'inbetween' aftermath.

Today my blog post focus' on the "inbetweens". Those victims who have and did drown and/or die,  only to recover (or be revived) and be alive.  However these victims, usually children, now live with disabilites and/or medical conditions that impact on their everyday life and their families.

Hannah's Foundation currently has 17 children aged between two years and 27 years(drowning at 15) who live with a multiple range of many medical conditions and disabilities caused by drowning. Sadly the most severe of the inbetweens will lose their lives to the injuries that were caused by them drowning. The Foundation has supported over 27 families who have had children survive only to die with weeks, months or years afterwards.   These families too matter because most often than not their stories arent told.  Many families just aren't able to tell their stories because its too painful and they live in fear of THAT day that changed their lives.  To all these families our support, hearts and love are with you all.  Evelynne's story is just one of the many drownings that happen every year. 

Evelynne's letter shares the incident in which her daughter drowned before two adults and other children in the pool. A good Level two swimmer, like many young victims, had somehow ended up on the bottom of the pool. It only takes a matter of seconds. Seconds count. The aftermath of a drowning affects everyone. The Parent, The Victim, others around them at the time, Emergency services, Doctors, Nurses and even police and those that are just too overwhelmed at the retelling of the story, its affects a whole community.  Drowning is a community issue that needs to be discussed.

Drowning is fatal. Drowning is living. But drowning too, is living with a life not as before. Life changes.    Just as this family as it does for many. I hope that the messages in Evelynne's letter can help educate on the risks around water, never be reliant on skills of children and always be alert with Supervision. As Evelynne stated in a subsequent email "If I hadn't of done CPR she wouldn't be here". Supervision, Barriers, Swim Skills and CPR save lives. In this case the Supervision and CPR saved a life but its not always like this. CPR is the last resort and Evelynne knows that her daughter was close to death. A drowning is a drowning. There is no who has it worse, who has it better. Whatever the outcome we must all live with the event and manage the guilt/burdens/grief/trauma and days ahead with honour and love from within.

Kat Plint
Founder Hannah's Foundation 

Evelynne's Letter:

Hi Kat,

After reading your blog on the Foundations website yesterday I felt compelled to share my story with you and to thank you for helping others.

In Dec of 2012 my kids and I were visiting a cousin’s house. I had given birth to my third child six days earlier and my older 2 aged nine and five decided they would go for a swim in the pool with their cousins. My Five year old had completed levels 1 & 2 in swimming lessons and she was confident in the water where she could stand. My cousin and I supervised the children, sitting only a metre or so from the pool. I looked down briefly to mix some formula for my newborn. It didn’t seem like i was distracted for long but in those few moments my five year old daughter lost her footing on the pool safety ledge and slipped silently and quickly beneath the water.  While jumping in and out of the pool my nine year old son and his eight year old cousin spotted her on the bottom, they dove to pull her up and surfaced calling my name frantically. She was blue, foaming at the mouth and nose and was lifeless. She wasn’t breathing. The world stood still. I scrambled to find a safe place to put the baby and I then grabbed her lifeless body. I laid her down beside the pool and began to breathe into her mouth doing CPR. After multiple cycles of CPR and compressions my daughter finally took a breath, vomited and opened her eyes.  I will never forget this or the smells.

Her eyes were eerily glassy and I didn’t know if she was going to be ok.  The ambulance officers arrived but her oxygen levels were very low. I had to keep her conscious, but all she wanted to do was close her eyes and go to sleep.  We soon arrived at the hospital where she was admitted. She had fluid and vomit on her lungs and her oxygen levels needed to be monitored as they kept dropping. Somehow though, through the grace of God or whatever powers were looking over us that day.  Whilst no permanent damage is visible there are learning disabilities as she has started school.  These will need support as she grows older and we are thankful that we have our little girl back. 

I, in no way claim to know what you or anyone else who has lost their child to drowning is going through but I do know that the scene of seeing your child like that is one that haunts me every day. I am forever panicking about where my children are, whether the toilet door is open or closed (for fear that my little one will fall in head first and drown), wondering when something else is going to happen, constantly fearing that I will lose a child because I wasn’t attentive enough - just like I wasn’t that day.  Life just doesn’t seem the same. Things that were once fun to do as a family, turn me into a panicking, not so fun mum, worrying about every possible hazard. I feel like I’m suffocating my kids but I don’t know how to stop it. I get frustrated when people don’t seem to understand how urgent the situation was that day and how quickly it all unfolded before us. All they see is that she is here and just can’t understand why I am the way I am. I been told to 'get over it' and that I have to 'move on'. But I can’t. I just can’t. My mind won’t let me.

Thank you for reading my story and understanding it.  Please share my story so that others who live in fear like we do every day can find comfort that they aren’t alone.  Maybe reading my story or others like yours could save lives.  

Kind Regards
Evelynne

Surely it's not that time again?

So it is August. The weather is nearing fine from the coldest winters in Australia and recent storms to our perfect weather of today of sunshine, warmth and the Australian way of life... Spending it near, on or around water. I fear the inevitable now because it's that time again. It is time for drownings. Totally preventable but sadly we will see the latest report out soon saying the sadness of statistics of all those families losses reduced to just numbers on a report page. How depressing.

Drowning and the subject of same has become a way of life. Everytime I take Harry out or his friends on our new farm I'm alert, I'm aware and obsessive (to the point of crazy) that they must stay within my sight and never go near the dams. I have life jackets on cued standby. Our Cattle dog Banjo, who is deaf, loves the water. We venture down to the dam on a walk and Banjo throws himself in it without thinking (after all he is a dog, albeit a deaf one) and gets all muddy, washy and intends on having fun. It's a dogs life afterall. I sit and watch my son and his beloved four legged friend having fun, chasing the ball, Banjo retrieving it and bringing it back for yet another round. Harry has four balls on standby if he loses one. In my mind I sit and ponder, alert as I am that something could go wrong. My heart rate is up, naturally. My son is around water. A natural water feature of mud, murky water and follage. All potential dangers. My mind races as I watch them. I jump at the first sign of the dog getting caught in the follage and breath a huge sigh when Harry says "He's okay mum he just dropped the ball". Hell I'm not dropping mine. My mind is alert, my heart is always in my throat, I'm always talking to Harry and he knows to always talk back and hes within 5m of me and the dams edge. He too is now water alert and on guard. He doesnt go in the water to retrieve the ball, that is what the dog is doing. He intelligently picks up a rock and throws it near a ball that is missing that Banjo can't see. he improvises. I sigh with relief. The dog sees the ball after the rock is thrown. I wonder how many kids would have just 'gone in' and got stuck and drowned. Harry knows better but he'd never be at the dam without either one of us. I sit back and Harry (all of aged 8 and beyond it) talks about those families who have had dam drownings and the messages we advocate. Harry is a little advocate with a soft heart and he gets upset when he speaks of those kids he knows so fondly. He tells me how he feels about loss and the loss of his sister and how he wishes it was different. Harry was only 17 months old when Hannah died. He doesn't remember her which breaks all our hearts.

We walk back to the house and another day ends with dinner and a tired out deaf cattle dog. All ready to do it again tomorrow.

This is just one day, in our life as a family who has suffered a drowning, trying to live normally. Next it is swimming lessons privately with Di, swim lessons at school where I also volunteer to give the kids more one on one time and the education about breath holding and its dangers, the diving into shallow waters, talking to teens about drugs/alcohol and swimming at the same time, looking out for your mates and community events and speaking. Its warmer weather again and we are becoming very busy. I feel exhausted just looking at the calender. Its nearing October 4th, the anniversary is a dreaded, awful time ahead. It is yet another number in our life. This year the numbers are seven and ten. Seven years since Hannah died and her tenth birthday in December. Another life robbed life.

At a friends house I go into another meltdown and my heart is in my throat when the mop bucket is in the kitchen and her toddler is in the tv room. Another potential tragedy waiting to happen, so I just empty it. My friend is "Kat's lost the plot again". Its a common saying by many of my friends but until attitudes change nothing will change in the statistics. Drowning can happen to anyone not just those with dams or pools or those that fail to empty the mop bucket. We must, as parents be alert. If we care for children we also must be alert. Eyes on all the time, never faultering to a book, a text, facebook or having a nap. Water kills. Water is dangerous. It's time to get serious about how to save lives. My heart beats are overwhelming at times to the point I cannot speak (I'm sure many would love the silence). I am fearful of what the warmer weathers will bring. After all its what we do as advocates.

So I challenge anyone who reads this to think and ask themselves "How will I change my ways about water and children?"

How many of you have answered the phone when the kids are being bathed? Left the children alone to make dinner? Grab a towel? Walked inside to get something and left the kids alone in the pool or the backyard? Not fenced the house off from the dam? Propped open the pool gate? or removed a panel of your pool fence to fix it only to leave it til tomorrow? or left your little one in the care of an older sibling? If anyone says "shit.... I've done that" Take note. My life could be yours. My crime was not supervising Hannah on the verandah of our house, where she had clear access to a chair and our pool fence whilst changing the nappy of our son Harry. The rest is historically painful. Drowning only takes a split second and it takes 30 seconds to drown and to lose brain function. A whole two minutes is what it takes to die. Forever. Gone. No second chance.

Life is about choices and actions. As Parents, our actions are contributory to safety and we must all be alert, be wise and be on guard, always thinking about safety. It is not just about water either. Cars in driveways, televisions or cupboards falling over, hot water in the kitchen, blind cords, window screens the house hold list goes on for the potentional dangers that can kill our children.

I urge everyone, every parent and carer to always be safe because life is too precious. I am dreading this warmer weather because of what I know, what I have seen and what I can forsee coming. I hate the latter. I want to prevent it. So does our son, so does every family ever touched by tragedy.

Please Supervise children always, never leave them alone, never prop open the pool gate, never leave them in the bath, never swim in murky waters without a life jacket, empty the mop bucket, teach kids about water and the dangers, yes by all means teach them to swim but remember SWIMMERS DO DROWN, SWIMMERS CAN DROWN and learn CPR, whilst its the last end of life saving its something. I just pray as a parent that no other parent ever has to try and revive their child after two minutes in a cold pool. No parent should lose a child. EVER.

Kat Plint
Advocate and Mother of Five